Dripping Life February 13

February 14th lands this very week -- so Valentine’s Day is upon us, as is American Heart month, a strong reminder to live heart healthy, eat heart healthy and -- of course -- remember those you love on Valentine’s Day. But first, the more serious focus.

According to the American Heart Association, heart disease -- including stroke -- is the leading cause of death among men and women in the United States. These two diseases, heart disease and stroke, are the No.1 and No. 3 killers in this country, claiming more than 865,000 lives each year.

In 1963, the American Heart Association (AHA) first worked with Congress to require the President to declare it as American Heart Month. Each year since that time, each sitting president declares February Heart Month with a goal of educating the public and helping Americans become healthier -- through changes in lifestyle, nutrition and exercise.

Our cardiologists today know much more about heart disease than they did in the 1960s and are equipped with a growing number of tools to keep this ravenous disease at bay. However -- and this is just a personal observation -- it is extremely distressing when physicians report finding symptoms of heart disease in younger and younger patients.  So, let's be sure we are educating our youngsters about the importance of the right nutrition and exercise while they still have time to correct any non-heart healthy behaviors.

Let's also take this time to talk about the other "matters of the heart" we celebrate in February -- Valentine's Day. According to research at the University of Rochester (NY), the number one way to meet your future spouse in the U.S. is through friends.  The number two way, to nobody's shock, is online.

One friend, a self-proclaimed "medium" (as in the paranormal zone) said she met her current boyfriend through online dating and that she knew he was the perfect one just by looking at his photograph. Although they haven't married yet, they've been together for several years and seem extremely happy.

The University of Rochester scientists reviewed more than 400 psychological studies and surveys to come up with their findings...and In one study, they found that in a single month, close to 25 million unique users around the world were using online dating...a phenomenon one researcher called "definitely a new and much needed twist on relationships."

Since nothing's perfect, here's the downside of online dating: Skimming over hundreds of potential mates when using an online dating service can promote a "shopping" mentality, in which people are excessively picky and judgmental. Also, many online daters correspond with one another for weeks or months online before meeting face-to-face, which has been shown to yield unrealistic expectations.

On the other hand, the researchers studied behavioral economics and found the dating market in Western society is totally inefficient, particularly once people leave high school or college.  Therefore, they believe the Internet holds great possibilities for helping adults form healthy and supportive romantic partnerships.

So, what's a single man or woman in our age group to do when they want to find at least a dinner partner or someone to go to the movies with?

According to the research, first let your friends know that you're looking. If this produces no results, you might want to try your church or synagogue, although proceed with caution. A long-ago colleague found a nice man with a good job in her congregation. However, after several weeks of dating, my friend found Mr. Wonderful not only had a good job, but some embarrassing personal luggage we don’t want mentioned in a family paper.

This year's Top 10 Best Dating Sites are (in descending order): Zoosk with a five-heart rating, Match.com, Chemistry.com, OurTime.com - for people over 50, eHarmony.com, ChristianMingle.com, Matchmaker, JDate, and SingleParentsMeet.com.

Adventurous enough to try it out? Just remember to keep your phone number, work number, email address, home address and other personal information confidential until you know -- for sure -- you want to get to know someone better. Other rules for online flirting, dating and meeting include: 

1. Be honest in your description of yourself and use an up-to-date photo.

2. Don't assume other people are using recent photos.

3. Learn the online lingo: When someone says, "I've been told     I'm handsome/beautiful," they probably heard that from their mothers...and if someone says they're cuddly, that's code for "have 20-30 lbs. to lose." 

4. Ladies, leave your cleavage to the imagination...not online as an obvious “For Sale Sign”  -- and guys, no specific personal physical photos (and you know what I mean), please.

5. Be careful of the "instant relationship." The need to love and be loved is so powerful, often singles project the future too fast. The best things in life are worth the wait and the        courting phase is one you'll want to remember, not rush into.

As that much-quoted wise man --- Anonymous -- wrote: "Loving someone is like caring for a garden. Love it too much or too little and it dies, but love it just right and it will live forever."